Total Transformation can help your Problem Child

Total Transformation topic- Renegotiating. I concur with James Lehman that when you as a parent let your child renegotiate with you, you teach your child there are no firm boundaries. You want boundaries on agreements you make with your child. Example: If you tell your child there will be no desert if he/she doesn't eat their dinner and later give in, the child learns your no is not a firm no. You don't want your child thinking boundaries can be pushed. Another example of lax boundaries: You tell your son to walk the dog in fifteen minutes after his TV show. He agrees. The TV show ends, a new one starts and he promises that he'll walk the dog at the next commercial. That commercial comes and goes and he renegotiates saying he will absolutely walk the dog after another fifteen minutes. If you keep renegotiating with him what he'll learn is your fifteen minute boundary is flexible and does not constitute a firm boundary. I believe children need boundaries. They need to know what they can and can't do. In life there are boundaries. Even if you are a free thinking parent who believes in "no boundaries" there are still boundaries. If you drive over the speed limit you can get a ticket. A child in school can't hit another, nor can he steal from stores. If he does he gets a consequence. So teach your child the true meaning of boundaries at home where they should learn it.